10 Commandments for Nursing Fathers

    Nursing Fathers

    In today’s article you will find tips for nursing fathers to ease life of their wives after giving birth to the baby. This information will be useful for both wife and husband because they are family and they need to help and support each other in any situation. Otherwise why is family for?

    1. Your wife is a woman in labor, your baby is a newborn. In this complex and amazing time of your life, they exist for each other; this amazing symbiosis is created by nature. Jealousy is a normal feeling of a young father who may feel to be unnecessary or in the background. It is important to use this feeling for constructive purposes! Do not let the grandparents alienate you from the baby, and tell your wife that you want to feel involved in what is happening to two most important people of yours.

    2. A young mother, especially if she has given birth recently, needs your support that can be replaced with nothing else. Do not deny her this support, even if you are stresses out. A cup of tea in bed and a kind word are those “minor things” she will remember for a lifetime; they will become the most important foundation stone of your marriage.

    3. The first weeks after birth are a bad time to explain to your wife what difficult times you experience. You better share this with a friend, who is also a father of children. It will be much easier for him to understand you than for your wife, who is half-dead from exhaustion and weakness after labor. Despite the fact that it’s not that easy for men to get used to a new role, it’s not that easy for the woman as well, even if she looks very confident as if she is a mother for her entire life. Remember – her life has changed forever too.

    4. If your wife is breastfeeding, it does not mean that you have no opportunity to establish contact with the child. Aside from the feeding process, there are a thousand ways to communicate with your baby and to be a very important person in his life. From the very first days of baby’s life, the father can bathe or swaddle him very well. If you are not yet ready to perform such “extreme” activities, then you can take the baby for a walk, carry him in your arms around the house and talk or sing to him thus letting the mother have a little rest. Offer your help, and do not be offended if your wife’s instinct will force to refuse you (naturally most males are unable to care for the child, and the genetic “memory” of your wife can deceive her at this stage). After a few days or weeks her hormones will begin to become normal, and the baby’s mother will be glad to share care about him with her beloved husband.

    5. Remember that the baby knows the sound of your voice, he heard it within 9 months in the womb. The baby can calm down when having heard the beat of your heart or having put his head in a hole between your neck and a shoulder. Act, because you are his father! You will be able to calm the baby and make him feel confident.

    6. Nursing mother will sometimes feel diffidence. For example, she may think that the baby does not get enough milk. Your faith in her and her abilities as a mother will be the best support. Support her in a moment of weakness when she feels pain or experiences difficult times. She will appreciate your efforts.

    7. “Give him a bottle of baby formula if it so hard for you to breastfeed!” This phrase is a very bad way to encourage the nursing mother who faces difficulties. If she succumbs to weakness and gives up breastfeeding, despite the fact that she always stood for the importance of breastfeeding for her child – she will inevitably feel the bitterness of failure. Moreover, she will remember that you didn’t believe in her, you did tell her to give up. Even if she will say that her decision was correct and conscious, she will still subconsciously feel hostility to that one who “has cut her wings”.

    8. “Maybe try to feed him just one more day? Just until tomorrow!” These are the words your wife will remember with gratitude. Repeat them every day as she is fighting for breastfeeding your child and can give up at any time. There is no any better way to support the nursing mother who is experiencing hard and painful times. If there are problems with breastfeeding, you need to find information to solve them, or invite an expert. Consultant services are usually not free of charge, but baby formula is not also given for free. Read the information on the benefits of BF and its adjustment – knowledge will give you and your wife more confidence. It is important to understand that you do all your best for your child to get the best thing – breast milk. This is not the most important task of the parents, isn’t it?

    9. A nursing mother, especially if she has just given birth, needs good nutrition, plentiful drink and rest. If she does not get what she needs, she will often feel bad and eventually will be irritable and nervous. Remember this the next time when you feel that she is “brawling for nothing.” You can bet that cooked dinner, a cup of hot tea and half an hour without the baby in her arms will return tranquility and balance into your family.

    10. Starting from 6 weeks of age, most babies are able to live a 1-1.5 hour without food. Let your wife spend 1.5 hour in a cafe with a friend or go shopping without the child, and you can rightly be called the “father of the year”! But ask her to leave a bottle of expressed milk just in case.

    Dear dads, how do or did you help your wives to care about the baby and cope with many difficulties? Dear moms, do you have more tips to share with other fathers? Share your story and wisdom with other parents!


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